The Eye of the Storm

 All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness... (Psalm 25:10)

Several years ago I had the opportunity to fly to San Francisco for a long weekend. Up until that trip I had never flown before, I can't say I'm a big fan. But I will never forget the flight home for as long as I live. When we left San Francisco it was cold, rainy and foggy - yes, very surprising since near as I could tell from my one weekend there, it is usually...well...cold, rainy and foggy. As soon as we started taxiing down the runway I pulled my book out of my bag and started to read - there was nothing to see out the window but rain and fog.  But not very long into the flight the cabin was suddenly filled with a brilliant light. Startled from my book I looked out upon one of the most breathtaking sights I have ever seen.  A Brilliant blue sky above and below - the most incredible, white, fluffy mountain of clouds for as far as the eye could see. I was literally awe struck at this sight.  How could I forget that just because it is raining on the ground doesn't mean the foul weather extends all the way to the heavens - there is, after all, sunshine above the clouds.

Today I had a similar revelation while driving down the road.  We have severe storms all day and in between cells, I ran out to the store.  Suddenly I noticed up ahead a sunny spot in the road, when I looked up I saw that for just the briefest moment the clouds had parted and there was a beautiful round hole - past the dark rain clouds was visible a wall of white fluffy beauty and when you looked up further a gorgeous glimpse of blue sky. Then just as quickly as it developed, it was gone. 

Up until that moment I had been having a sad day...not a bad day, I just felt sad over a lot of things. But seeing that and being reminded of San Francisco awoke something in me.  It reminded me that no matter what is happening on the surface of my life - there is one thing that is sure and unchanging and that is God's love for me.  No matter how much rain may fall upon me, no matter the storms that come or the sadness and dreariness that mark some seasons - the light of Christ, the warmth of the Son, the love of God, the clearness of God's mercy and goodness are a constant.  I may not be able to see them, cloaked as they are behind a curtain of rain - but that doesn't mean they aren't there...they are always there.  I may have to wait out the storm, or travel a little higher and a little longer to find it...but it will always be there...waiting to warm me, nurture me, love me, welcome me, cheer me, forgive me, redeem me.

In the midst of the storm look for the eye, gaze upward and see that the perfect sunshine and beauty are still there...as is God.

Songs Amidst the Thunder

I woke this morning to the sound of thunder (and yes I am hearing Bob Seger in my head as I type that line) and heavy rain. It is very hard to get out of bed on a morning like this and so I took the luxury of lingering there for a bit. I did not sleep, I just listened...and prayed...and listened some more.  I would like to say I heard God speaking to me and leading me toward some great epiphany...but I did not. I tried listening harder...I still heard nothing.  So I stopped listening...and oddly enough - that is when I started to hear.

I stopped being so intent on hearing God's voice and instead I just let the sounds around me begin to nurture me. The rolling thunder - this isn't a violent storm, it has the gentleness of a lover, the murmur of lovely words whispered adoringly in your ear.  The falling rain - mostly a steady heartbeat, sure, even, strong, never threatening. And then I hear the unexpected - birds singing joyfully! In the midst of a storm even the birds have found a song worth singing this morning.

It occurs to me that in church circles we often talk about the raging storms of life and how God is there to calm the seas and get us through - and this I believe to be true. But...it also occurs to me that sometimes the storms in life are gentle ones.  These calm and gentle storms are the hardest, for we don't always see the need to seek God and cling to him as we do when the storm is raging and violent. In the gentle storms we are lulled into a sense of peace that says, I've got this God - no need to busy yourself today.  And there we languish in our own sense of self control and assurance.

I've been in the midst of one of those calm storms for a while and today as I listen to the birds sing I am finding refuge and redemption in the midst of this storm. I have sought to put God back in his rightful place as Lord of my life and I have handed the reigns of control back over to him. I have found peace and comfort in his refuge. I have found redemption in his forgiveness.

Now I lay here, listening to the birds sing...we share joy. They say to me - sometimes a storm is just a storm - relax, listen and enjoy.

It is Well With My Soul...and my body...and my mind...

At midnight a new day blew into town....and I do mean, it literally blew in with a violent storm beating at my hotel window. I lay there listening to the rain, wind, and hail...and I wondered, will anyone tell me if I should take cover? Will I know if danger is approaching? Needless to say, I couldn't get back to sleep for a bit, I just laid there and listened to nature roar.  All this fuss because the temperature was going to change - a cold front moving in and a warm front moving out - not a big deal it would seem but at the line where the exchange occurs - turmoil, chaos.

How like life that is.  This week I have been making some changes of my own - trying to get healthy again: body, mind and soul.  I have hit the gym every day. My muscles have been stretched and crunched, pushed and pulled. I am feeling muscles I never even knew I had and they are not happy to have been awaken from their long slumber.  They rage, they hurt...or at least they did. Today they are more alert, they are not screaming at me every time I try to take a step or rise from my chair.  They are starting to wake up. My trainer tells me this is normal and ok - waking up sleeping muscles is painful business but the pain won't last and the benefits are worth it.

How like life that is.  I have discovered that waking up a slumbering soul comes with its own pain.  Pain in knowing you have pushed God to the sidelines. The pain of realizing your own ego has hindered or hijacked the work you were called to do.  Stretching the soul to take deeper lunges of thought...pumping the soul to more weightier issues...these things are accompanied by their own pain.  But I am assured that is ok, it is normal. I am also assured that the pain won't last and the benefits are worth it.

This journey with God - to Barnes and Noble, to the Garden, to the gym - has been an incredible, insightful and healing process. It has not been without pain...but that's ok. The pain has not lasted and the benefits are already felt.  

In the calm sunshine after the storm, God has spoken..."Feel my warmth? See my light? Hear my call? You have weathered the storm, all is calm...all is well."