CUP: Lenten Devotional Day 45

Lenten Devotion Day 45

CUP

But Jesus answered, "You do not know what you are asking. 

Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?" 

They said to him, "We are able." 

Matthew 20:22

Late last night I set the table. Today is Maundy Thursday and our prayer station is the table...the table where cup was shared, bread was broken and feet were washed. Each Disciple has a seat around the table and as I set each place I tried to put myself in their shoes. What were they thinking this night? What was their mood?

I thought it would be Judas' place setting that gave me the most trouble but it wasn't...it was Peter's. Peter is the one that frightens me. Right or wrong I can firmly convince myself I could never betray Jesus...surely there is no Judas in me! But denial? Well, that is something altogether different. I sat in Peter's seat and wondered as his own confidence that he would never deny or abandon Jesus and yet before the cock crowed he had done so not once but three times.

 "Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?"

Peter was so sure he was...and eventually he did...but at that moment he couldn't.

Am I? Will I? Could I?

Are you?

NIGHT: Lenten Devotion Day 21

Lenten Devotion Day 21

NIGHT

Then Jesus said to them, 

"You will all become deserters because of me this night; for it is written, 

"I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered.' 

But after I am raised up, I will go ahead of you to Galilee." 

Peter said to him, 

"Though all become deserters because of you, I will never desert you." 

Jesus said to him, 

"Truly I tell you, this very night, before the cock crows, you will deny me three times." 

Matthew 26:31-34

I wake up each morning with the grand intention of being an obedient disciple of Christ. I pray I will devote my every move to his call and I vow that all my heart, mind and soul will be devoted to him. I have no doubt it is a similar feeling to Peter as he declared to Jesus, "I will never desert you." I am sure it was unfathomable to him, after all he had given up and all he had seen in the last three years, that he could walk away and leave this man he loved so much. I'm sure it was heart-wrenching for him to hear Jesus prediction and think - He doesn't trust me! How can he not trust me after all we've been through.

And then night came.

In the night comes our deepest fears, insecurities and anxieties. As the darkness creeps in so does the second guesses and the weaknesses. Every bump in the basement is a threat, every creak of the stairs a sign of impending terror. Confidence is easy in the light when you can brace yourself for what you see coming your way...

and then comes night...

Reality that we aren't as confident as we had hoped and we aren't as dedicated as we have vowed is what dawns in the darkness. It is the fear of what we can't see and know, the doubt of what we thought we were so sure of. 

In the night it comes and we don't even know it at first...and then the cock crows...and we remember.

We look around at the faces surrounding us and we know - suddenly - we know that we failed to keep the intention of discipleship...we failed to be devoted to his call....we failed to keep the vow of dedication. We hope we can keep our shame hidden in the darkness with us until we remember - Jesus knew - he called it already. You will fail...you will desert...you will scatter...

in the night.

But

Dawn breaks

Sun rises

We remember 

3 days after the darkness

Son rises

New life

begin again

forgiveness

redemption

LOVE

it all comes

after 

NIGHT